How to bridge the gap between parents and children ?


方华    03/16     8335    
5.0/2 





■请你们在这相识,互加关注我再撤群?

● 好主意 ! 你是现如今最牵挂儿子的妈妈 , 发起父母孩子微信群 , 留下 , 试试看 ?

●How are you doing ? It's a very kind gesture to getting connected with you and my dearest old friend Yan. If you agree , we all write and talk in English in this group wechat , we can keep this group by  adding our children who happens to be in New York either study or work . That is on the assumption not taking too much time from you 

■■How are you ? I will talk to you ( write) more on the way home. It's a busy day today.

● take a rest while on the way home by subway  (?) .there is no rush on any matters at this period of time which is a good thing . Of course we are all happy to have a chance knowing you .

■■I'm taking commuter bus, which last over an hour. I use the time to check my email and WeChat.

● high efficiency  !

□Amy is a digital science fellow and her current project is remodeling the library by designing a dynamic peripheral soundsystem. So yes, acoustic modeling to redesign the function of the space.

■■■Hello everyone! Hope you're all having a good day. On behalf of Alex and myself (he s busy in meetings right now), we wish you well and look forward to talking soon.

■ Hello Amy and Alex: have not seen you guys for a long time, probably since my son Mark's birthday party at New Orleans. Welcome to our chat group

●Oh , yeah ! what a good old time we had  ! Though time flies.  since we two mom kept sending each other photos & messages , I feel we are growing up together .

●yuhong  thanks to Yan & wechat. Our life are nowadays intervined  with each other. Ask your Irvine  friends whether like to join this group chat 

■■■很高兴能和您联系上。多谢殷燕了。下次去纽约一定拜会。●@殷燕 Amy Alex have not returned your message yet , you may  now understand and accept Mark's way to  communicate with Papa & Mom.

■■Hello! Busy day at work. Happy to get connected to everyone again. It's been a long time!

● I think Mark may want to join since there are so many young people here already

● No problem , Daoling's Job doesnot allows him wechat much at all . this wechat group is English only

●Thanks for your kindness ! Most likely we the parents might meet up with you  before they do . Career wise , they will seek for your guidance and networking when they need to. To be  very honest with you & Yan , they do not communicate with us the way we thought it could be . Due to their independence and our limited knowledge  with what they are working on or studying about

■■that's very typical, nothing wrong with it. But it is easier for the parents to know, that the kids have some one nearby to turn to, just incase. But it never happens. I have few kids from JingShang school classmates here in New York, no one wants to bother me. But I told them, I am here if you need me. One thing I can't help, is to help them to find a boyfriend or girlfriend, as some of my classmates confided to me. I thought I might organize a barbeque party in summer. I used to have these for my own children when they were young.[呲牙]

●Exactly,  agree with you 100% . A summer BBQ sounds great !

■ I can not get Mark to use WeChat. A lot of my friends' kids use WeChat, but not Mark. For example, he plans to go to Cancun, Mexico for spring break with a few classmates, to try to set up connection in case of emergency, I asked him to set up WeChat, 微话,he refused and told me I can reach him via FaceTime. He also dictates how should I reach him: text only, no phone call. So far, I still do not know whose parent organized the trip or contact person except paying for the trip.

■他先得到Wayne 的支持,我不出钱他会用他夏天挣的钱,用钱是挡不住的 

■■Mark will be fine! It's important to teach young kids rules, value and judgment. But when they over 18, they are pretty mature and very hard to influence from parents. A 18 years old is different person than a 15 years old, another than a 13 yo, another than a 10, 6, 3 yo. Parents should recognize that and treat her/him differently, even they trapped in the same body.

■■welcome to the group, 

■you might have to help our JingShan classmates' kids to find girlfriend and boyfriend eventually

● that is the issue you may get his Dad more involved in dealing with Mark . My heart feels your longing for help 

■■Mark will be fine! It's important to teach young kids rules, value and judgment. But when they over 18, they are pretty mature and very hard to influence from parents. A 18 years old is different person than a 15 years old, another than a 13 yo, another than a 10, 6, 3 yo. Parents should recognize that and treat her/him differently, even they trapped in the same body.

■■Good morning! On the bus again. For me, in terms of grown kids, no news is good news! But, again, when it comes to communication, it is very hard at teen especially at tween age. I don't remember asking my parents or some strange "uncle" for any advice, no matter what topic. I rather talk to same age friends or read books searching for a solution. But, later I found out, older friends are very helpful to land me intern jobs, give me carrier advises, etc. 

 Good morning! On the bus again. For me, in terms of grown kids, no news is good news! But, again, when it comes to communication, it is very hard at teen especially at tween age. I don't remember asking my parents or some strange "uncle" for any advice, no matter what topic. I rather talk to same age friends or read books searching for a solution. But, later I found out, older friends are very helpful to land me intern jobs, give me carrier advises, etc.

● 我们大人们可以留下~如果曹老师原意的话没关系,我们有事没事的可以聊聊孩子们的教育,工作等。

● 我们大人聊 。Amy , Alex 想退群 , 说不好意思不回话 , 但又太忙 。就让他们俩孩子退群吧 。

● Yes , let's have faith in our offspring , bless them instead worry about them. Their life is like  sunrise ~ getting brighter every minute !










●@h.Emerson Chen  特别尊重也喜欢哈佛老帅哥的 Passion for doing everything he is interested in in ! @h.Emerson Chen 也盼望您在话剧筹备组多发言呢 ! 

■@方华 以行動支持我所敬重的群主!明天獲邀請拍攝(碧血黃花)話劇,期望有佳作展示!先看我老當益壯的照片!為特奧會加油打氣! 

●@h.Emerson Chen 佩服您啊 ! 才力体力心力好棒 ! 

●实验一下 , 希望这11颗莲雾能接着长大 , 星期二带到聚会上去 , 大家尝鲜 

 ■好红好美! 

■丁龙很吸引人。是一个带理想主义色彩的传奇人物。 

■各位话剧社的朋友, 周日的话剧听说很不错,我问了一下,大概在5:30, 最晚也不会晚过6点结束,天气还很早。看后可以互相分享一下观后感,也可以学习别人的表演技巧,以便对话剧有一个真实的体验和认识,有时间的朋友可以跟方华结伴同行哦

■@Sherry Gao   ,何不同方华结伴而行看话剧呢? 看多了就有一个比较与鉴别,也有利于自己的提高。 

●我也不一定能去 , 因为眼睛不适合在下午强光下开远程 。你放松随意就好 ! 星期二的聚会么 , 我也只是提最后一次 ,盼望见到你呢 ! 尊重你自己的心愿 ! 

●大学校园~岁月时空的最即兴率真和天地人和的剧场舞台 ! 

■英达让儿子搞冰球,他知不知孩子将来要受多少伤?这是瞎折腾 

●孩子肯定自己喜欢 , 不打冰球 , 也有受伤的可能性 。@h殷燕  妈妈的心思总是多虑些 , 可以理解。 

● 我孩子跑马拉松 , 膝盖痛 , 就建议他找到更适合自己体能特征 , 先天有潜能的体育项目吧 ! 

● 有的孩子一下就找准了 , 有人需要尝试比较 

■孩子才8岁,没家长在那推波助澜,咋会这么起劲。我儿子当年也喜橄榄球,我就是不在校队家长认同表上签字,结果去折腾了棒球,足球。冰球,橄榄球最易脑受伤,小时家长推,能出成绩,但到高中尤其高三,高四,或职业,没身体天分那是白费劲,推这种高危体育是害了孩子 

●如果孩子是自然喜欢 , 他们的身体应该是有那方面的特殊素质的 。多祝福孩子们 ! 

 ■@方华 跑步对 膝盖损害大,你儿子还是快步走好,这样既锻炼了身体又对膝盖损失降到最小?

●@h殷燕 回头聊 , 我需开车出门了。 @h殷燕 谢谢你的建议 。有些吃惊 , 你似乎过于为Mark 担心了 ?







■@方华 孩子搞了这么多年体育,我要是过于为他担心,他就不会已经经历过这么多的injuries,伤病。骨折等都算小伤了。但另种伤,像脊椎,头脑,相信是任何家长都不能容忍的。搞冰球,橄榄球就很容易有这种重伤,到时后悔莫及。 

●也许在选定某项体育运动之前 , 让医生做个全面身体检查 , 神经科 , 耳科 , 眼科 , 骨科~~, 有一套系统数据 ? 

●@h殷燕 傍晚给你电话 ? 你和孩子还有他爸爸 , 多商量一下 。

●Happy August ! 

■@方华 现在都不是体育的问题,爱剑走边锋的孩子真令人操心。碰上爱开飞机,登高山探险,酷爱潜水开快艇的孩子,那真是不顾家长感受。上星期儿子就与朋友去漂流,还上来就5级,最险的。他是玩得高兴,还说途中出事,向导吹起了口哨要求救援,我这干生气,拿他没辙。Jacqueline Onassis Kennedy 生前不准儿子小Kennedy买飞机,也是同理吧 

●交流和反映这些人生故事 , 就是我们家人朋友的关注和题材 , 我的答案是交付给成年了的孩子们自己和他们的信仰 。我们每个人的一生 , 可能已经是神意写好了的书 ? 

也可请教朋友们的看法 !